Life goes on....(Full Story)

I am Nysa. I just turned 25, and I am here to tell you a secret. This is my story. If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you probably want to know is where i was born, and what my lousy childhood was like.

I am Nysa Frank, daughter of Danish Frank and Samra Frank. I was born in a well-established family and grew up with all the comforts. I have a very loving brother who is five years younger than me. We had a very beautiful family with six members. My parents, grandparents and two siblings. We were a perfect family.

 

In the year 2000, I finished my schooling and it was time for me to join the university. Being a diligent student, I easily got admission in the Oxford University. And now I had to leave Texas and my family for my studies to settle in the UK. It was the hardest decision for me to stay away from my family. But I wanted to make my own identity. I wanted to do something on my own. This was my only aim in life.

Leaving my family behind I reached my dream land, London. After three hours of driving i reached the city of oxford. When I saw the university, I was out of the blue. My luggage was placed at my room and I was guided to the library.

 

I hadn't really visited many libraries in my life, perhaps, because I didn't have very many libraries, close to where I lived. As I mentioned earlier, it was a university library which stood tall in the heart of our large university campus. It was a four- storey building with enough space for reading for nearly all of its students. This library had a great influence on me, primarily because I could learn about a lot of new and interesting things, every time.

Moving here and there confusingly I stood and suddenly heard a rough voice, “Hello Miss. Do you need any help?"

I turned back and saw a boy with a typical Asian look. He had a fair complexion and large eyes. His pointed nose complimented his black hair.

"Not really. I am a bit nervous as it is my first day. But I am fine. “I said.

The boy was continuously staring at me with his large eyes which made me feel uncomfortable. After few seconds he broke the ice once again and said, “OH! Never mind. I am Harish Khan from Pakistan. This is my second year. It was nice meeting you."

He sounded nervous.

"Hey! I am Nysa Frank. I am from USA. My mothers' a Pakistani too. “I continued.

Breathlessly he said, “Wow! That's interesting."

"I don't find anything interesting here. I need to go now. See you around."

 

Saying this I walked quickly as possible because the guy was annoying. His continuous staring made me a bit awkward.

I was a very dedicated girl and was there only to fulfill my dream.

My dream was to become a successful doctor. For that I had to keep distance from annoying and misogynist guys like him who just wanted to flirt around and took girls for granted.

The rest of my day passed very well. I took a tour of the university, communicated with my to-be classmates and had a deep conversation with my roommate, Aina.

 

"For me achieving my goal is the biggest priority. God has been great to me. I just want to make him proud." I said.

"You really inspire me, Nysa. I feel so positive talking to you."

"Hmm...Thanks."

Aina again said, “Now you'd better go and change."

I went to the closet and changed into my night suit.

 

Three months passed and my hard work increased day by day. I was good in all the subjects except Chemistry. Chemistry was never my subject.

One particular day, being seated in the library I was struggling to understand chemistry. Instantaneously, the guy I met on the first day appeared and sat beside me.

"Are you endeavoring with something?"

He was tall and a well-dressed boy. But still I never liked talking to him. Keeping in mind the decorum of the library I whispered softly, “I am really poor in Chemistry . It never goes inside my head."

 “And chemistry is my subject. If you don’t have any issue I can help you with it.” The guy said soberly.

There was a moment of stillness and then I continued, “Are you sure you’ll be able to teach me.”

“Of course.” He smiled.

“I will be waiting for you at seven in the morning exactly right here tomorrow.”

After saying this he left the library.

“What should I do? What is this boy? Can I rely on him?”

Many questions were raised but I wasn’t sure what to do.

Next day without thinking about anything I went to the library and unexpectedly Harish was waiting for me exactly at the same place.

“Hey! Good morning.” He greeted.

“Good morning. I wasn’t expecting you.”

“That should be my line.”  

“Ha-ha!”

“Show me your book.”

Handing over the book to him I gave a fair look.

From that day I started improving my Chemistry. We used to study for some time and then talk about our families, goals and interests. It was repulsive for me to say so but he had managed to get a soft corner in my heart. I didn’t know what he felt for me but I started liking him. Little did I know that this was the starting of my personal destruction?

It’s crazy how fast time flies and how things progress. It was the last year of my first year and it was great to be in the university. I was scoring good marks in my tests but my dedication towards the studies was not the same.

I heard my phone ringing and unexpectedly it was my ‘MOM’. I then realized that it had been months that I hadn’t talk to her. I hurriedly took the call, “Hello Mamma. How’s everything?”

“So finally you got some time to talk to me, huh?”

“NO, Mamma. Actually I am very busy with my studies. I hardly get time for anything else.” I said.

“I can completely understand. But what about your grandparents? They are growing old and you know they love you more than anyone else. Just call them sometimes and talk at least for few minutes.”

“OK, Mamma. I got to go now.”

“Bye, Baby.” She ended the call.

Was I really selfish at that time? This was not that Nysa who loved her family more than anything else in the world. How did I change so much?

To be continued…..

I had the most loving grandparents in the world. Not talking to them for a day used to make me sad. But the situation had changed. Nothing really mattered to me except my friends and Harish.

One week before the exams, Harish called me and said, “Nysa, I am really disturbed. Can we talk?”

“Why not? What happened?” I replied.

That day we talked the whole night and it continued for the whole week. I didn’t care about my exams, not even my goal. I wasn’t prepared for the exams but the basics I knew helped me to pass. The results were out. I was just passed but I didn’t care about it. I was extremely happy for Harish as he had topped the university. I thought that it was time to confess my feelings for him because it was his last year. I was prepared mentally for it. I planned to invite him for a cute date. I looked at the mirror and fixed my hair.

Suddenly my phone started to ring and it was my brother. I ignored the call and switched off my mobile. Fixing my dress I got out of my room.

I searched for Harish and got to know that he was in the classroom. I saw that the classroom was empty. Harish and Asfand were talking. And surprisingly they were having a conversation about me.

“Harish are you serious about Nysa?” Asfand asked.

“Why?”

“You both are really close and I think that Nysa likes you.”

“You think that?”

“Yes.”

“That’s what I want.”

“What? Why do you want that?”

“Miss Nysa Frank, High school topper. She topped the university in the first three months. How could I let her take my place, huh?”

“What do you mean, Harish?”

“Asfand, girls are really weak. Two emotional lines and they cry for you. I did that with Nysa. She can never be the topper. I am the topper of this university since two years. I have made a new record. Yes, Nysa is a bright student but she can never be the brightest.”

“Oh Jesus! Were you using her?”

“Yes.” Harish replied seriously.

Tears rolled down my eyes. Streams of tears flowed faster than my heartbeat. I sniffled quietly. I looked away as my face turned red. My chin trembled and my vision was blurry. It was difficult for me to see clearly. I ran towards my room and locked myself.

 

How can a person be so heartless? I cried my eyes out. This was not me. This was someone else. I was completely broken. Two days had passed and there was no one for me. Not even my friends. I decided to forget everything and continue with my studies.

I went to the washroom and washed my face. My phone was switched off since last two days. I wanted to go back home but I didn’t have any option. I switched on my mobile and saw a lot of messages from my brother. I wondered why he was texting me.

“Nysa, grandpa is not well. He is in the ICU.”

After reading this text I was so shocked that I was unable to think clearly. My grandpa, the most loving and caring person was not well. How could I be so selfish? Suddenly my anger overpowered me. My irritation flared. A wave of fury crashed through me and without thinking about anything I ran towards the library. Harish was standing outside the library. As soon as he saw me he walked closer to me and said, “Thank god you’re back Nysa. I was so scared.”

After seeing his face my molten anger rolled through me and my temper sparked. I slapped him in front of everyone. His face turned red. He looked at me angrily.

“What do you think about yourself? You think girls are weak? Using people who don’t bother you is weak which means you are weak as piss, Mr. Harish. And you know what? You don’t deserve anything. Just being good in studies doesn’t make you a good human being. You want to make a record, right? You want to top the university for one more time. But you won’t be able to do so. This is my open challenge to you.”

Saying this I walked away with a great attitude. Everyone was quiet. Harish looked somewhat shamefaced. He had traded me for his ego and now he was embarrassed in front of everyone.  

I walked quickly towards my room and cried out loudly. No, this was not the tears of guilt or sadness. I was proud of myself. This was me. This was Nysa.

After sometime I remembered about my grandpas’ health. Immediately after that I called him.

“Hello, Nysa! Where were you? “He said.

“Nick! Where is grandpa? Is he fine? Please let me talk to him.”

“Nysa! Calm down. Everything’s fine. Grandpa is much better now. I am confident that he’ll recover fast if you talk to him.”

“Yes. “Tears rolled down my eyes.

Nick handed the phone to grandpa.

“Grandpa?” I cried.

“Talk to me. I am sorry. I am really very sorry. I was distracted. I was lost somewhere but now I am completely fine. I love you grandpa.”

“God bless you, my love. You can never get distracted. You were just going through your life test and you have passed successfully. I am proud of you.”

A flood of tears gushed down my ashen cheeks. It was painful for me to talk to him. Once that first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. I bent forward where I sat on the floor and pressing my palms to the mat, I began to cry with the force of a person vomiting on all fours.

After this I remembered my grandpa and his talks. I was filled with positivity after that. My tears vanished and I promised myself that I will never hurt my loved ones. I stood up strongly and arranged my books and dress for the university. I decided to join university from the next day.

Next day, I went to the university. After seven days of breakdown it was really hard for me to ignore everyone but I helped myself to stay strong. Aina was the only one with me. She was always there for me no matter that I had ignored her for others.  She wasn’t there in the university when this scam took place. I focused on my studies. I had missed a lot of lectures and it was really hard for me to get things into track. The whole day I prepared my notes and it was time to return back to the hostel. 

“I am sorry, Nysa.”

Harish stood in front of me with a downward gaze. He was avoiding eye contact with me. He was playing with his hair and was giving vague gestures. I could read his body language. It wasn’t normal.

Avoiding him I tried to leave the place but he stopped me by holding my hand. I gave him an angry look. He left my hand and took his steps back.

“Don’t even dare to hold my hand.” I said fiercely.

“Just listen to me, Nysa. I just need five minutes.”

“You want to waste more five minutes of my life? Okay, come on waste it.”

“Nysa, I am really sorry. I have done a lot harm to you but now I want to apologize. I want to make things better.”

“Harish Khan, what do you want from me? Why don’t you get out my life?”

“I want you to forgive me.”

“Okay I forgive you.” There was a moment of silence and I said, “Did anything get better? Did I get my year back? Tell me Harish. Did anything change?”

“How can you forgive me so easily, Nysa? Don’t you want to take revenge from me?”

“Yes, I want to. But you know what? Forgiveness is the best way to make you realize that what you did was wrong. Because now, you’ll experience guilt and no feeling is as painful as guilt. Revenge has never helped anyone.”

Harish’s faced turned red. He took his steps back and left.

Revenge is the desire to get when someone does you wrong. It’s natural to feel angry but revenge is never a good solution. However, revenge reduces you to your worst self, puts you on the same level as those spiteful people we claim to abhor.

My grandpa always taught me to forgive and forget. I did the same. I was not a pushover. It was just about overcoming my anger and squelching my desire to punish Harish. I was feeling like liberating myself from the clutches of hostility and anger, because I had finally let it go. I was instantly feeling better.

It is impossible for me to remember how many days or weeks went by in this way. Time is round, and it rolls quickly. Today I am Dr. Nysa Frank. I am a neurologist. I have my own clinic in Texas. Everything has changed. I topped the university in the last year. Like my challenge Harish wasn’t able to do so. It really didn’t bother me because I had forgotten everything and moved on.

As time passes memories fade away somewhere deep within our heart. You must have suddenly smelled a perfume and been reminded of someone, listening to a particular song you must be remembering someone. That is it, those memories dug deep inside us and try to carve themselves out into your mind. This is what it is called, as time moves…situation changes and life goes on.

This is not only my story. It’s for everyone. No one has a perfect life; it is just made to look perfect with right people and thoughts. May be all you need to do to fix problems in your life is to just erase few messages, delete few contacts and smile. Each of us should forget what’s gone, appreciate what still remains and look forward for the future. Yes, life goes on whether you choose to move on and take chance in life, or stay behind locked in the past, thinking of what could have been done.

Through every dark night, there is a day; so no matter how difficult things might look now-“ In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.